humour

Twas the Day before Christmas…

…and I have to wrap. Oh the yearly wrapping dilemma. I suck at wrapping presents. I can never get the paper on tight enough. They always just come across as though I have wrapped them in a lumpy blanket. You would think after 44 Christmases, I would have figured out how to wrap presents, but oooooooohhhhh no, you would be wrong. So wrong. I am about to embark on this exercise once again. I have much to wrap and little ability to actually do it in a manner that doesn’t make gifts look as unappealing as possible. Wish me luck!

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This isn’t funny.

I was writing for Reverb Press, and that took up quite a bit of my time. The website is a left wing news source based in the US. As a result, I had been writing an almost endless stream of anti-Trump regime articles. Believe me, I am NO fan of Trump. But, at the same time, you can only write about the absolute bizarre dysfunction that is going on in the US right now for so long before wanting to pull your hair out. Face it, that Trump guy is an idiot jerkface jerkoff. Delving into what he is doing on a daily basis can just be downright depressing. Did he say something stupid today? OF COURSE HE DID! That’s what he does, on a daily basis. I don’t need to write an article every day on the stupid stuff that he does. It’s a given that he’s going to do or say something stupid.

So, I have moved on. I appreciate everything Reverb did for me in the time I was with them. I wrote over 300 articles. That was a ton of experience. And I made some not bad money doing it. But, all good things eventually come to an end.

Now I have more time to write posts like this, that aren’t overly funny, but none the less…are posts.

In fact, I will be changing the nature of this blog. Ya, it’s called Laugh With Chris. But, I do still love to write about current events and such. So, I will do that. It might be funny. Buttttt, it might also not be so funny. Let that be a warning. If you are coming looking for a laugh, I might be too enraged by a certain topic in order to do that.

Is Richard Spencer Still A White Nationalist?

You know that nazi guy, Richard Spencer. You may remember him from his staring role as “Man who gets punched in side of head” in a YouTube video? Ya, I’m just wondering…did that work? Did he denounce nazism after that? Did he suddenly turn around and go, “Wow, thanks for that! That is just what I needed to convince me that being a nazi is bad!” Did it convert him to some kind of less annoying ideology?

No? It didn’t work? WHAT? I am shocked! You mean, that strategy wasn’t as effective as people are making it out to be?? WHO KNEW!?

I’ve written more seriously about the whole kurfuffel elsewhere, like, on my other more serious, and annoying blog jammed packed with with opinions and rants that no one actually reads. You can read it HERE.

Midlife Crisis

I’m 42 years old now. I’m trying to plan a midlife crisis but it’s really hard to when I don’t know exactly when I’m going to die. What if I start a midlife crisis today and end up being hit by a truck tomorrow? Then it will have been a latelife crisis and I’ll look like a complete idiot. Or, if I start today and live until I’m 109, it will look like I really suck at math, and again I will look like a complete idiot. I need to time this right. If I start today then I must make sure I’m dead by this time in my 84th year of existence. That’s the only way I can see coming out of this ahead as a winner.

Separation of Politics and Comedy?

Much of my comedy has been weird one-liners. But, I’m a super political person and I keep wanting to branch out into more political comedy. How is that going, you ask? Not great. I haven’t actually been able to make it work on stage yet. It hasn’t gelled. I have a bit of work to do on that.

I wasn’t sure if I should do political stuff on this blog. My other blogs are almost exclusively political or discussing this or that current or not so current event. I thought I would try and separate the two. But if I am going to actually do political humour, then I guess I can’t really keep the two separate, can I? So, it looks like my posts on this blog are set to be a little heavier than I intended at first. Maybe?

Anyway, how’s that Donald Trump working out for everyone?

Ya, ya, ya….I know

Holy geez. When I started this blog I was sure it would be a blog I would keep up with. I haven’t. I lied. I lied almost as if my last name were Trump. First name Donald. Middle initial J. That’s how bad I lied. Mind you, unlike the actual Trump, Donald J. I am admitting that I lied. I’m not presenting this as an alternative fact of some sort. That would be kind of pointless because it’s obvious that there aren’t a million people here….I mean, that I haven’t actually written anything on these pages in, like, forever.

Anyway, for now, I shall end this here. I promise I will write more sooner. And as I say that, I am sure you know what I mean. It means I will make another blog post in a few months or so telling you how much I have neglected this blog. That’s all this blog is going to be. It will only be posts about how I haven’t posted in a long time. Exciting, eh?

My Pet Peeve?

There are just not enough comedians out there doing Robert DeNiro, Christopher Walken and Arnold Swartzenaaga (okay, I don’t know how to spell that name) impressions. Come on, people! Step it up! Get with the program. If you can’t do these impressions how are you expecting to make it to the big time? Look, work on it people. Every comic at an open mic should be doing these impressions, not just half of you hacks, ALL of you, dammit! It’s what the people want. Give the people what they deserve!